Archive for December 3rd, 2007

Pity Party

The only problem with the translation business picking up is that I still have to work during the day for now (the whole having to pay rent and not wanting to be “in between” jobs thing….? yeah)… and I’m very tired.

I’m starting to have to turn work down because I have to work during the day.  It’s frustrating.  Really, really frustrating and I feel like it slows me down. 

I don’t even do much at this job, honestly.  Hardly a thing.  So I feel useless for 8 hours a day when I could instead be translating.  But I have to wait until I have the steady income for the translations before I can quit this.  So while I do that, I have to work here, for that weekly paycheck… so I can live.

I got a request from this awesome woman I’ve worked with before, to translate a huge file and the deadline is simply not doable for me.  I can’t.  Not with this daytime temp thing. 

If I didn’t need this daytime job, I would start the translation right away and e-mail it to them by the deadline.  But I can’t do it right now.  They want it by tomorrow morning European time… that’s midnight tonight.  I can’t start translating until 5pm when I get home.  So that gives me 7 hours to do more than I’m capable of.  I e-mailed her and asked if I could instead turn it in in the afternoon (Europe time).  That seems to be okay.

I feel like I’m running in place and it’s bumming me out.  I feel grumpy and wish I could have it a little bit easier.  I feel like I’m being held back from my dreams.

I think I’m just exhausted from not sleeping much.  And I have the winter blues – it gets dark here, and the snow melted the day after it fell.

I wish it would stop raining.  That snow the other day was so enchanting and now it’s just an ugly grey day that’s affecting my mood and making me feel slightly sorry for myself.  I also wish it weren’t December.  It’s one of my least favorite months… the coldest, the most emotionally difficult, the most stressful…

Oh please January get here soon….

6 comments December 3rd, 2007


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